A Very Difficult Year

A lot of change, even more lessons learned. I just learned nearly every personal lesson I pushed off in order to focus on business for the last decade… crash course style of course.

I’m starting over in almost every respect. I’ve reached out for help from friends and family for the first meaningful time in my life. Without that help, I wouldn’t be getting back on my feet right now, I would still be dealing with the falling down process. No one is solving my problems for me, but they have helped me defer dealing with all of them at one time and by myself. Thank God, and thank them.

Biggest lesson learned this past year = ask for help the day you need it. Not doing so is actually a terrible choice because by risking falling down, I become less capable of helping others myself. In other words… had I not been stubborn in wanting to do everything myself, I would be helping others right now instead of needing help myself.

Perhaps I have PTST, ADHD, some form of OCD and/ or a version of depression… I don’t know. Rather than seek a path of medical doctors to classify me and prescribe me stuff, I am returning to the lifestyle path that has always served me well and made me happy inside without such prescriptions and diagnosis’. Eat right, work out, work my butt of at work to be proud, find a couple hobbies, talk to friends, go outside, look forward and immerse myself in positive attitude studies. It works for me, and has been for long enough again now that I am finally past/ done/ over/ beyond this past year of horror.

I still have some nightmares, wake up 3-5 times per night, am getting back on course towards my financial goals, and mending relationships that have suffered.

This past year, I nearly died twice and lost my legs once from an infectious disease called cyclists, had a growth removed from my head,  came down with pneumonia, became ill several times with common colds from a low immune system, irritable bowel syndrome, increasingly worse migraines than I’ve ever had, and all the damn medicines I was prescribed for everything… and I mean serious stuff like provigil, xanax, morphine, etc!

In case that’s not enough, a very long term childhood friend of mine passed away, a current friend and recent business partner passed away, and I separated from my “high school sweetheart” after dating again for a few years.

After a while though, I started dating someone else after being friends first and realizing we both wanted more… and then of course, she began having some health issues. She’s getting better now, and I’ve been better for long enough now that I’ve returned to work thank God.

That’s right, I’ve had to miss work… me, Donnie Cooper! And, I burned some very important bridges that I worked for years to build. That’s not like me at all if you know me whatsoever. I didn’t miss a day of work (literally not even weekends) since high school. And therein lies another lesson…. I can in fact, “burn out”. I’ve always disagreed, but I should have listened to my good friends about this way sooner.

Many, many lessons were learned this year. And, I have a lot of work to get back to where I was with my relationships and goals. but such is life, so be it, and be that as it may…..

I’m back on the horse.